2 Questions

1) If you cut people down even in fun, does it cause negative feelings?

I think it depends on the person and the situation. You should only joke around with your close friends. If you are not that close to someone, you probably shouldn't bash on them. It will most likely cause negative feelings. Also some people just hate to be made light of.

I have been trying to cut down on cutting people down. (<-nice) This is really difficult for me to do as they come so easily to me. Mary says that all my jokes come at the expense of other people, which is true because those are often the funniest. But in the spirit of trying to be more positive I have cut down on it a lot. Some of my friends tell me they like it when I bash on them. And yes sometimes depending on the timing, mood, and person you are hanging around, a little bashing between friends in not harmful. If you do it too much then maybe it starts to get negative.

2) If you hardly ever see your close friends can you really consider them your closest friends?

Some people you just have a history with and whenever you meet, you start off from right where you left off. These friends will always be there when you need them and are always there in the important moments.

But if you live close to your friends and you hardly ever see them how close are you really? It's really sad but most of my closest friends I see very rarely. But the people that I hang out with on a weekly basis, I don't consider to be best friends. Yeah we are close and I think I hang out with them out of convenience because we work together or go to the same church, but it is really contradicting. I'm not saying that the people I hang out with on a weekly basis can't become my best friends eventually. I mean that is the goal of all friendships or relationships for that matter, that you want them to get stronger and closer over time. I'm more talking about my existing best friends who I never see.